From the mouth of Troy:

The truth is wrong, so sometimes you have to lie to make it right.

From the mouth of Troy:

How come nobody has figured out how awesome I am?

From the mouth of Troy:

Anything interesting can be ruined by dullards.

From the mouth of Troy:

I'm planning on kicking the habit. I'm planning on slapping her, too.

From the mouth of Troy:

I shit my pants in the shower. I don't know why I was wearing pants in the shower.

From the mouth of Troy:

Got to heaven only to find God is an annoying name dropper.

From the mouth of Troy:

Believe me, I am quite aware of just how stupid I look when I'm dancing.

From the mouth of Troy:

When I looked in the toilet and saw undigested corn I didn't think it unusual until I realized it was still on the cob.