From the mouth of Troy:

I asked him to get off of his soapbox so I could get the soap.

From the mouth of Troy:

The strangest thing about aging is I have watched my belly button gradually move up my stomach throughout the years. It's now sitting above my right nipple. I'm so self-conscious about it that I almost put a shirt on when I go to Home Depot.

From the mouth of Troy:

We were frolicking in the water and I held her head under a little too long. Oops.

From the mouth of Troy:

I know we're all busy, but occasionally you should take a break and ask yourself, "Why am I the only one naked here?"