From the mouth of Troy:

My wife hates when I sleep with other women, but she sure does love the stuff I steal from them!

From the mouth of Troy:

Dead people are among the most inconsiderate people you will ever meet.

From the mouth of Troy:

I'd tell you the irony of it all, but I've never really understood irony.

From the mouth of Troy:

The truth is wrong, so sometimes you have to lie to make it right.